My friend often charges me with inventing new words in my academic writing. Entirely useful but invented words like “simulacral” have been known to slip into my papers, only to be excised by a judicious editorial eye. This page is a list of invented words (both my own and others’) destined to fame and infamy, even if only in the Kulturbot memory banks.

Bus-eye: Often a side-effect of gradsomnia (see below), you drag yourself to the bus stop after staying up most of the night playing video games. The bus arrives and you board, only to find it is packed with students and so you must stand. Half way to school you realize you are standing beside your friend and classmate–staring right at him actually–but you didn’t see him because your optic nerve was damaged sometime around level 14 of Zombie Killer 3. The funny thing is, your friend also has bus-eye, and didn’t notice you standing beside him either.

Habitus: Bourdieu’s term for the system of “durable, transposable dispositions, structured structures predisposed to function as structuring structures, that is, as principles which generate and organize practices and representations that can only be objectively adapted to their outcomes without presupposing a conscious aiming at ends or an express mastery of operations necessary in order to attain them.” (The Logic of Practice 53). Also described as a “feel for the game” (Field of Cultural Production, Intro p.5), not entirely understanding what this term means will not prevent us from dropping the H-bomb now and then.

Homeopathic Reading is the practice of reading difficult or adverse theoretical texts in small, regular doses so as not to have the brain reject the material outright. Practicing this kind of reading over an extended period of time has even been known to produce an immunity to initially hostile or challenging texts, but may also lead to adverse side-effects such as contorted speech patterns, social alienation, an inflated or diminished sense of self-importance, uncontrollable punning, seeing ghosts, not seeing ghosts, and eyestrain.

Gradsomnia: You have been running on four hours of sleep for several days and have to sit through a seminar on eighteenth century cooking utensils in romantic poetry. Gripping as the material is, you find your eyelids growing heavy and before you know it, you are having a dream about baking a gigantic pie full of journal articles.

Texlision is when it becomes impossible to avoid running into someone because you are speeding across campus to a meeting and they are so absorbed in texting someone that you are unable to a) anticipate their trajectory, and b) change your own path accordingly. It is, of course, also impossible to make eye contact with such people because they are staring at their hand-held device. The Ontario government has recently made cell phone use in cars illegal, so why not put some kind of limitation on pedestrian use of text-messaging? Or how about installing little magnets in all shoes sold in North America. Activating the text feature of your phone or Blackberry would cause the magnets to bind to each other, making it impossible to walk and text at the same time. Kulturbot patent # 400895-001.


One Response to “Bot-lexicon”

  1. The Pleasure of Being Robbed « Kulturbot Says:

    […] make it a fun film to watch. The film contributes to the production of a counter-cultural habitus that attempts to come to terms with the alienation of modern life by appropriating some of its […]

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